I agree completely with you, Tany. Well said.

If you are afraid of not being able to lead correctly with anyone but your partner, you are in one of two situations: 1) you're worried over nothing because you really do know how to lead, or 2) you don't know how to really lead because you and your partner have learned to cover for each other and can tell from some sort of made up language that no one else can speak (going on with the dance as language metaphor). It must be hard to be in a place which, as you say, doesn't have very many dancers, because it is really important to dance with different people.

Oh, yeah, and about asking people--in my experience people just enjoy dancing, and if you don't lead them that well then just keep on at it and you will improve. With the exception of the dance snobs, most of the better dancers will realise that beginners are the dancers of tomorrow and will not improve if not given a chance to dance. And anyway, the worst they can do is say no, which is when you simply ask someone else (ok, so its not quite simple but still...)

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Trees are people too!
¡Viva los árboles!

I perfectly know the feeling. I did my first steps where we just didn't learn the lead either and moreover I was dancing with one girl all the time only.
It was hard to change your attitude, even harder as you need to think not only of the steps but also of the lead which isn't easy at the beginning. However the only way is to try. I started trying six months ago and besides Samba where I'm still not so good at, I can lead all basic figures of the international gold syllabus. Basically you gotta know hat you wanna dance next and dance your steps and arm/body-positions. Mostly this will naturally lead the girl where she belongs

never give up and keep swinging
christoph

It sounds like you have only had group lessons which only focused on the figures. I have always ask what the lead is whenever I took group lessons. If the teacher doesn't respond, either he doesn't know or he hopes you will take some private lessons to correct this. Beware either situation. When I was starting out and while between partners, I danced with all manner of lady dancers, from lost cause types to excellent. I pride myself in my lead. I currently am competing and only dance with my partner and only occasionally dance with others. I still can lead anything and this is invaluable in competition as often a routine must be adjusted to maintain good floorcraft. Practice leading different dancers, the more you do it the better you will get. For a man it takes a good topline which we call in the US a frame. When you are beginning, your topline will look and be rather stiff this is not bad for a beginner, in time this will soften. Go out dancing and enjoy.

Hi,
It's been my experience that if you really want to continue dancing, losing your partner isn't the end of the world. I've had four partners in the couple of years or so I've been competing. Personally, I think that the more people you dance with the better. Not only can it be more fun (you get to meet more people!), it definitely improves your dancing. Don't get me wrong - it can be discouraging when you realize that you have a hard time leading anything more than basic figures! Think of it this way - it was tough when you first started lessons, wasn't it? It'll be tough again - but knowing that not only can you dance, but dance with anyone, will be just as rewarding.
Ballroom dancers tend to be very accommodating people. Unless you're flat-out reckless, most people will be happy to help you practice your leading on the social floor. So, have fun, practice leading, and remember that dance is a language - once you speak it, you'll always have someone to talk to.
Good luck, and happy dancing!

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--Eric