As a Follower, I find it frustrating when my Leader is sloppy, unclear, or does "Jungle Dancing." The experience becomes anxious and uncomfortable. How can I clue in my partner of the moment in a tactful upbeat way? Or should I just avoid dancing with him again?
cynxing@sover.net

I have just one question. By "Jungle Boy", do you mean he just smells like one??

As you can tell, my quest for mirth in the puerile continues...

In situations like yours, Swing chick, I am not sure what advice to give - "Just say No", or "Just Do It". But I believe that if we guys feel the prerogative not to dance with certain followers/women, the women should have the same prerogative. Which is easily achieved by you asking some of the guys to dance some of the times. This way, you are not at the mercy of Jungly Jim over there.

There is no easy answer, but tact is always a good approach. Good luck, and do insure your arms, elbows and all muscles associated with them..

Sri.

Hey Swing Chick...

Of course you always have the option to declin an invitation to dance, and if done so tactfully, with out insult.

I myself, though, rarely turn down an offer, even when the guy is a known "jungle dancer". I try to use it as an opportunity to test MYSELF. If you look at it as a puzzle or challenge then you can find some humor in the situation "We are going this way...oh, no we are going here, oh hey oh, a promenade, or maye not...well I'll just back up" You get the picture?

Rhythm dances are a bit easier to do this in as you can simply put a bit more space between you and Jungle Boy. Let him do his thing, you just smile. The rest of the room will see him swinging and flailing...you just hold your head up and look calm and graceful, and make the other women nod knowingly...

Just a thought
Larinda

To Swing Chick - I don't exactly have the answer but I will relate an experience I had with a upper level dancer.

Our association (non-ballroom) always hold an annual party and one of the ladies is a known ballroom dancer and a good one at that. Year in and year out nobody dances with her because her skills are intimidating, so, she essentially sits there all night and watch people enjoy. After taking dance lessons and countless hours of practice for more than a year I finally had the courage to ask her to dance. My purpose is not to test my skill but rather give her an opportunity to enjoy the party. She cheerfully said yes and while we were walking towards the dance floor she told me to lead and apologized in advance if she could not read the lead. That statement put some pressure on me to lead properly.

Now, that last statement worked for me as a leader but as the saying goes, "results may vary". Good luck and I hope you have other choice partners.