My husband and I just started ballroom dancing...in fact we've had only two lessons. We are going to spend our 11th wedding anniversary in New York City. We have booked a harbor yacht dinner and dance cruise for the evening. According to the adds the dancing is to a live band and is supposed to be ballroom dancing. So, we've taken a few lessons, know some basics and attended one dance at our local studio. We're not great, but we know a few steps and we figure why not go out in New York (where no one knows us).

Anyway, my problem is this...what do I wear? The cruise brochure shows women in simple cocktail dresses to one woman in a formal. As it is Easter weekend, I bought a full length formal (just on a whim) and I thought of wearing it to dance in. Would that be too overdressed? The only indication of a dress code on the cruise brochure says men are to wear a "dress coat". To me this means a tux, but my husband says a suit is fine. But it mentions nothing for women.

I have a simple black cocktail dress, that I ususally wear out to nice restaurants that I could wear.

Please give me some advice? Do I wear the formal or go for something safe and plain?

I definitely recommend some group classes at a good dance studio that has professional instructors if possible. The reason is you get to come early and stay a little late and watch the professions or real good amateurs practice and teach. I don't mean to speak ill of YMCAs and College ballroom clubs. Quite often those group classes are taught by excellent teaches and are very good. I only mean to say that you will in general see much better dancers at a studio. If you have any talent, you most likely will quickly surpass the others in your group class and may get bored or lose interest. When I was starting I found the dance studio to be very motivating.

Think of it like learning to play golf. Sure you can go to the local driving range and hit your practice balls along with all the other learners, but wouldn't it be better if you could go to a range where better people than you practiced? One can learn a lot by watching.

Having jumped through silver and danced in some Pro-Am opens, I can tell you that technique, form and posture are much more important then you may believe. Steps are relatively easy to learn. You can tack on one or two a week in a snap, and it won't take long until you can dance a two minute song at a dance party and never do the same two steps in sequence. However, if you learn the steps incorrectly, then even the Pros won't be able to follow you and you'll look terrible.

Private lessons are a necessity. You should ask for a syllabus and keep track of the steps you learn. Without a game plan, goal or target, you may just wander through the dance world. Mentally go through the steps during the week to get your brain thinking about the steps. You can really speed up your advance if you practice the simple exercises at home like your posture, your lowering and compression, moving your torso, cuban motion etc. DON'T just go to your private lesson and then work on the form if you didn't practice at all on your own since last time you were there. You should do your homework between lessons!

Good Luck

Well, it's YOUR anniversary, right? We aren't talking about the upper-end NYC BR scene, or a floating ball on the QE II either, but a nice little put down the Hudson you hope to be special for the two of you, who have also hardly begun to learn to dance together. So, I'd suggest you don't overdress or overpressure yourselves, but simply wear the recommended rags, and walk gingerly around the yatch as if you think you own it in a suble way - you will fit right in with the NY-er's that way (hee-hee), and can concentrate on having your own fun instead, on your own special evening together. Real NY-er's seldom care what others think of them. If you do much dancing, you are also likely to get hot (I don't mean from a marital aspect, but that's another nice possibility).

While you're in NYC, consider dropping by Dance NY (5th Ave), for a peek at some great dancing or a drop-in lesson.

Frank,

My husband and I will be in New York the weekend of April 27. We are planning to go to Dance NY (we've been there before, great place) on Saturday night. We were going to try Dance Manhattan (W. 19th st, off 5th Ave.)on Friday for their open house party.

Have you been to Dance Manhattan? What is your opinion?

Thanks

Betty and I will be in New York several times this summer and would greatly appreciate information on the dinner dance cruise -- and on other dance places in the Big Apples.

jpbdance@juno.com